Disclaimer

[Buju]

This was posted on the Keys Craigslist in the boats section. I love it... and
while not a mechanic by any stretch of anyones imagination, I've fixed up enough of other peoples crap to understand their irrationality perfectly.

1. There hasn't been anyone for over three thousand years that could raise the DEAD, please don't expect your mechanic to fix everything.
2. If you have over two thousand dollars worth of work to be done, please don't look for a mechanic to do it for two hundred dollars.
3. If you have a two hundred dollar boat please don't get mad if your mechanic says it will cost more than two hundred dollars to fix your boat.
4. If you buy a boat please ask for the owners manual, then read it.
5. If your are going to leave your boat unattended to for months, please don't expect it to be just as you last used it.
6. If you use your boat in saltwater remember that it is the most corrosive liquid on the planet earth so rinse and/or flush regularly.
7. Don't expect every boating accessory to fit you boat, not all boats are created equal.
8. Please don't keep looking at your watch if it is a hundred in the shade while your sipping ice tea and the mechanic is in the sun over a hot running motor.
9. Please remember to thank your mechanic every once in a while, he will probably be fixing someone else's boat while your back at play.

[CaptPatrick]

Add to that:

Service work $(dollar amount)
Service work if you watch $(dollar amount x 1.5)
Service work if you watch and ask questions $(dollar amount x 1.75)
Service work if you help $(dollar amount x 2.0)