bertram31.com

OK guys.. I have to ask a question.. I am pretty much a newcomer here.. been here for a while before the hacker forced Capt Pat to change the forum..

I had a boss once who said he allowed a new employee to ask stupid questions for 6 months after they were hired, and after that they should know everything.. my 6 months has probably expired, but I really need to ask...

What the heck is a "HYENA BOAT"?

Uncle Vic's pet name for a B28.....

Br,

Patrick

Uncle Vic will answer the Hyena question, but I will comfort you with a dumb question of my own.

What does "RLDT" stand for???

I've watched the boards and waited as long as I can...curiosity has the better of me and while us new comers are outting ourselves that's my dumb question.

IRguy....your a brave leader among men.

Scot

I prefer to believe they are called hyena boats because they are fast nimble and fearsome hunters. Truth of the matter is U.V. believes they resemble a hyena draggin its ass when they are up and running.

RLDT: Timmy's pet name for the B31: Rolling Little Death Trap....

Br,

Patrick

Scott, this is Timmy-The-Thudd's pet name for 31's. Stands for "Rolling Little Death Traps", comes from Timmy's habit of getting deathly ill offshore on boats less than about 60 feet LOA - he can take Hatts as small as 41, if they never leave the dock.

Thanks I needed that. Leave it to Timmy LOL.

Scot

Thanks for clearing that up. I have been on the board for a couple of years now. The Hyenna boat was easy to figure out, but the RLDT had me beat. I thought it was getting time for to suggest that Capt. Pat to post up a Dictionary section. Tony Meola

I'm still waiting for the official nickname for the B20 and B26. You kind of feel like an outsider around here if something that you have is not getting picked on.

Chiles
(Timmy started it)

I guess myself or IRguy don't have your patients and we don't mind asking dumb questions.

Tony you must be a manager of something, somewhere, because the only guys I know that can last two years wanting to know something that everyone else appears to know and still say nothing.....are managers.

Hats off to you, now you know and didn't have to "out" yourself.

Scot

Thanks Scot.. I don't feel so bad now that you have asked another question that I was wondering about. There is strength in numbers!

Now let me cover all the issues I need to know..

Hyena boat is a B28...
RLDT is Timmy's name for a B31...
Red is the port side...
Green is the starboard side...
Pointy end goes forward...
White side goes up...

There.. I think I have it all down now! Whew.. What a relief!

Tubb- is UV's name for what is truely the best boat ever built(as well as the first production fiberglass yacht) the 41 Hatteras

Tubb is shorthand for Tubb of Guano.....

UV

That's why Timmy uses a sawzall on that number #4 Wash Tubber, to remove all the Guano. Doesn't matter how much of it you sawzall, it still has a bunch of Guano on it.

That's why RLDT! RULE. BUBBA!

R,
DQ

You guys forgot the venerable "bubble boat." UV's favorite term for Bayliners, and, well, just anything else that is not a Bertram. I should know, mine has been called a bubble boat, a blackandbluefin, who knows what else (but, NEVER, EVER, a RLDT).

I'm surprised that Capt. Patrick even let me onto the new site... maybe it's because you guys need some B31 wannabes for our entertainment value.

I think Thuddd and the chain saw Tubb have the market cornered on the entertainment value.

Scot

Unfortunately I do resemble that, but normally I don't wait two years to ask. I just did not want to give my self up to this crowd. I am usually one of those managers that needs to know. Its something about survival which is something that gets tougher and tougher in the Corporate World. Tony Meola

I started my boating career in the early 70's with a early 60's Wood lapstrake "Cruisers" 20' I/O and all of my friend at the Gulf refered to me and several others as "Monkey Boats" ............never understood why......always wondered why..........never asked why.........

Why does everybody give Timmy such a rough time.........seems like he enjoys being on the receiving end of the rough time

Harry Babb

Harry,

I guess Timmy hasn't blasted you out of the water yet. Hit me with both barrels on the first post I made....something about "that piece of crap bla bla bla ....." But he does seem to be toning it down lately. I sorta enjoyed the other Timmy, the one that simply logged on to insult everything Bertram and everyone that owns one.

I finally figured out that deep down all Timmy really wants is a Bertram.

I enjoy his antics and I think most guys are just poking at him so he will get fired up and continue to entertain them.

Scot

Harry - obviously you never met Timmy......Let me put it this way - his social skills are not like ours here in the South......At the fancy hotel in Panama City, PA on the way to the UVI at TSL he made the cute desk clerk lady cry by being......well, just being Timmy... Good news is her boyfriend Guido was busy dealing dope of something, so Thudd still has kneecaps.

When I banned wife-beater shirts at the UVI in Port Eads he showed up with one on and I had to have my Gestapo remove it. Let's see....other than that, he's a top notch guy, will give you the wife-beater shirt off his back. His credit is good too. And his girl friend is a very nice lady to boot, she did not slap the sh*t outta him once in public that I saw at FLL.

Yo fren'

UV

I certainly enjoy the entertainment..........I cannot remember who but I think that Timmy did have some sort of smarta** remarks once when I shared my plans for "De Nada".......Did not take long to realize just what we are playing with.......I think that Timmy is funny........
Harry Babb

Timmy tried to become a Bertram owner once. It fell thru. The owner of the Bertram 20 wised up and realized that Timmy still had some personal issues to work out before he could become a steward of such a fine piece of engineering and style.

Now, Timmy is stuck with his 41 foot Hatteras which I dare say, will not see water now for several years. The bright side of that is the other boats owners in his marina will be saving thousands in keeping sludge off their water line and replacing zincs.

I agree with UV on all accounts. After going hunting with Timmy and enjoying his hospitality up north, I can personally vouch for him. He is a top notch guy, but mis-directed on his taste of boats.



Chiles
(Timmy started it)

It's 6:15 am. I'm hung over(good bottle of single malt) don't need this abuse, though I probably deserve it. Only reason I almost got some ratt ass bertram, was it was easy, kinda like making fun of Bertrams. Now that I'm older, and I've had the opertunity to learn from Capt Pat, UV, that DQ guy(your parole office called) Andre, The crooked judge from Tx, Matt, the proff, shit the list just gets bigger and I'll piss someone off for forgetting, so sorry, You couldn't get me to havwe a Bert no matter what.
I must say I'm sorry to those that I've insulted and don't remember. And if I haven't insulted you yet, your turn is coming, even that dork with the hundyi powered boat in Va. What the hell was he thinking???? got some crap boat with bad motors, lets get the Koreans involved, duuuuuuuu

I'm ditto as well about Timmy, to all accounts stated above. Timmy if you ever come down to the Gulf Coast, I'll take you Flounder'en or Mullet fishing, will even teach you to throw a cast net if you haven't done that or how about Redfishing. Its all inside Pensacola Bay, so you want get sick.

Harry, I started as a Monkey Boat fisherman and loved it, getting the Sh** beat out of you fishing offshore in a 20' center console Marlin fishing with Beer cans for teasers. Was part of the original Monkey Boat Billfish Tourny out of Pensacola way back when. The largest Blue Marlin ever caught on a Monkey Boat out of Pensacola was 730# on a Wellcraft 20' Cuddy Cabin. Fisherman hangen on for dear life on a Monkey Boat runen thru 2-3' seas with saltwater spraying everywhere.

R,
DQ

Thuddd,
Thank you for clarifying that. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.


Chiles
(Timmy started it)

DQ,

What's a Monkey Boat?

Timmy,

In your last post you said it's "6:15 AM"....but the post log says 6:54? You may want to see a doctor about that "loosing time" thing, it can be serious.

Your concerned friend,
Scot

Scot...

You weren't accounting for his nap!

If I remember correctly, "Monkey Boat" is a term of endearment given to center console boats by those fishing off large sportfishing vessels, because you see all the passengers in them in rough water hanging on to everything they can, like a bunch of monkeys in a tree, swinging around wildly.

And if I am not mistaken, "Hyena Boat" was first earned by Ernest when he ran his 28 to the UVI in Port Eads several years ago. Uncle Vic called it that for the reasons mentioned earlier and 28's have been called that by The Faithful ever since. I thought Ernest might actually rename his boat that on his Diesel repowering bit it was not to be. Walter

In Alaska, we'd spot them out in the Gulf and everyone was hanging on for dear life. We called them "Puker Boats". Some of the time, they only had one engine. Trouble looking for a place to happen.

Dick

Scot, the log says 5:54 pm. It was 6:15 am, I was on my way to a job an hour away that took 2:45 cause of the great job they've done on the 18 BILLION dollar tunnel project that fat teddy (and the great tip O'neil) was able to get federally funded. Always want to thank all you tax payers from around the country for that little gem.

Maybe since the membership has dramatically increased, Thudddd just does not have the time to personally insult every person individually. Maybe he should consider hiring an Assistant Insulting Agent. Job description could read as follows: Insult all users on Bertram 31 Website. When finished, replace all blades on cutting tools.

I suppose I am next on the hit list.

Not yet Kevin, other than your use of good motors in that crap platform, you've done notheing to set me off, unlike , well that would be a really long list, and once again I'd piss of people that thought they deservid to be on it..

You get the pm on that tricell stuff? The rep left a VM at the office. Think I'm going to have him send a price list, just so I can get a laugh

Got it. Just got the delivery in the mail too. The wife opened the box and picked out what would appear to be the most expensive looking sample. Imagine that!

I can now say that there is no interior in the boat, except where the air conditioner was mounted. I am scared to find out how much the tri cell is going to cost. hoping less than the motors.

That's very interesting Capt Mike. I have made many a day on "Monkey Boats".

So if some guy's are out in a Bayliner CC, does that make them "Bubble Monkey's?" or maybe "Bubble Puker's?"

LOL, Gee you guy's are sure teaching me a lot.

actually in the strictest sence of the word ...CC's cant be "bubble boats"...its the clorox bottle shape associated with many no gunnel ,clamshell constructed , unseaworthy "boats"...its all about sacrificing everything else to get more interior room...i think

Randall is right. From now on, in my opinion until someone comes up with appropriate term for the boat, we shall call them dumbasses.

Scot,

Capt. Mike nailed it right on, but it has nothing to do with Bulbliners. I would not be going offshore in one of those things.

Anything 26' or under was consider Monkey boats back then because of range and fuel capacity competing against large boats, 28' or larger.

Today some Tournments consider anything 31' or under a Monkey boat but I personally don't agree with that because a B31 will out fish most big boats in my opinion. The right engine package (Diesels) and fuel capacity to get the range you need, if you have a long distance to travel to the fishing grounds.

Now Timmy has the right name for a Monkey boat (RLDT) because he would be blowing his grits everywhere in one of those offshore when its rough, if he cannot take rough water.

R,
DQ

When the Monkey Boats started showing up off Port Eads in the early 90s we just slept late and moseyed out about 10 am to look around. Most of them would start running out of fuel before noon if the blue water was more than about 25 miles offshore. Here the best blue suit bite has always been between about 11 and 2. The ability to run and fish long makes diesels the choice for the B31.

Still real cold here, hate it. Putting up with some aspects of living in the South is supposed to be the trade off for it being wam most of the time.

Cooking a fresh ham on the BBQ right now, been on for over 5 hours, telemetry says it about be's done.....sure smells good.

UV

UV,

Not my kind of weather either, in the 20's at night, night & early morning with wind chill in the teens-Burrrr! I'm a southerner, don't like the damn cold!

So when is your recipe book deal gonna be done?, UV, the Offical Justin Wilson of the B31 Sand Box. You always cooking something good!

R,
DQ

UV..

Seriously.. why don't you start a B31 forum cookbook? Put in your favorite recipes, solicit some from the other chefs here, and sell it with the profits going to the boss here. Probably the B33 guys would be interested as well.

If that would be too much work, how about creating another section of this forum with our favorite recipes? Even as a immigrant from Yankee country I have a recipe or two that I could contribute.

My "The Captain's Cookbook" has 226 pages of illustrated "how to do it" seafood recipes from Charterboat Captains from all over the US and the Caribbean. Every once in a while Uncle Vic offers some up for fundraising for the site and I also give some to some of the Rendezvous committees to raffle for their events. Vic- want a donation of ten for some fundraising? Walter

P.S. I have illustrated several of Vic's recipes and sent them to him What he's got basics for is "A Coonass Cookbook".

walters bein a little modest here....it is a totaly outstanding piece of work with great recipies and wonderful illustrations...we had one before we ever met walter....of course if you ever ate at walter's house you would know who the chef in the family is.....best diner in town

i meant dinner..but supose it could work either way

Walter...

How can I get a copy before Christmas? Good gifts for my wife and daughter.

E-mail me your address. I'll respond asap. Walter

Agree - Walter's book is top notch. I doubt I'll ever put one together since there are dozens of good cajun cookbooks floating around. Walter, bring a couple to TSL in June and we can raffle them off toward the bar tab....

UV

You got em. Wonder if we can ship them ahead?

Walter's book is top-notch. My culinary skills are, at best, lacking, and Walter's book has actually made me look good. Plus, its the only cookbook I know that's nice just to leaf through for the illustrations, general style, and pics.

John F.

walter, sure we can. I shipped some of the Prof's UVI shirts to Louis Sola's kid Anthony down there, piece of cake. I'll get the details to you.

I did a big - probably 7 or 8# - bone-in boston butt pork ham/roast yesterday. First I took a LOT of fresh garlic cut in slivers and stuffed it in holes punched with a knife. Put as much as you think it needs, then double that. I peel the garlic by putting the pods on a cutting board and laying the side of a wide knife on them and whacking the knife with my hand, sorta crushing the pods, then they peel easy. After stuffing with garlic, pour a little olive oil over the roast and rub it in, then rub it with crushed garlic (sort of puree' garlic), then a lot of salt, then some seasoning like Tony Chacherie's and rub it good. Take a big metal baking pan and put a wire stand in it to keep the roast off the bottom of the pan and let the fat drip. Good idea to spray some Pam on the wire stand to keep things from sticking. Oh yeah, slice up some more fresh garlic and place loose on top of the roast.

Put the roast, uncovered, in a 325 degree oven for about two hours, then put on your covered BBQ pit over indirect heat at about the same temp (a few hickory chips give it a little jazz, but soak em in water for an hour or so beforehand). Use a meat therometer - the new wireless ones are the cat's meow - and cook until the center is 170 degrees. I usually move the temp probe aound a few times to make sure its all up to 170. Takes about 5 hours total cooking time, 2 in the oven and 3 on the pit. Remove, cover with alum. foil and let it sit for 15 or 20 minutes before slicing.

Momma-slapping goooooooood, mon cher.

UV