bertram31.com

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... and those who don't and are always seen with a bottle of water in their hand.

As Ben Franklin said:
In wine there is wisdom,
In beer there is freedom,
In water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 quart of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed about 2 lbs of Escherichia coli, (E.. Coli) – bacteria found in feces.

In other words, we would be consuming about 2 lbs of poop a year.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine or beer
(or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor), because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

So remember:
Water = Poop
Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.

We need more posts like this...


Barkeeper...filler up!

Great advice...sippn on JD...E coli antibiotic for sure...BH

You guys know what I think.

i drink alot of water, so i guess i eat alot of shit, that sounds about right. lol

ya know i always thought some of yall were full of shit

I never drink water and I'm full of shit.

there are always exceptions to the rule :)

The French drink wine, the English tea.
The Yankee drinks his hot black coffee.
The child drinks milk nine times a day.
The Scotsman sips his whiskey toddy.
You can keep you wine and keep your tea!
My curse on him that brings me coffee!
I'll drink porter, if I may.
It makes me feel content and happy.
Porter quaffed down with a laugh.
The gentry have their aching livers.
Water is all right in tea,
For fish, and things that swim in rivers.

I've an iron constitution and fear water'd rust it...
CX?

One of my favorite logo's and slogans

In Alaska, we have a saying:

"We don't drink water; fish shit in it."

Words to live by...

Cheers!

John

Toulouse Lautrec used to put live goldfish in the water glasses at his parties to discourage their use.

I have a friend who is a retired court officer. Some of his daily jobs were to be sure each morning the court room was furnished with notepads, pencils, etc, etc. He also was supposed to be sure the judge's desk had a water glass and a thermos of fresh water. He was an extreme practical joker. One day he knew the judge who would be presiding was also a practical joker. My friend put a couple of goldfish in the fresh water he put in the judge's thermos. You can imagine the uproar when in the middle of hearing a case the judge poured out two goldfish into his water glass!