http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QI1go72c ... re=related
For anyone who has had or is about to have a colonoscopy.
Colonoscopy
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Tony Meola
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Colonoscopy
1975 FBC BERG1467-315
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In Memory of Vicroy
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Spit my GD coffee all over my shiny new keyboard.....funny.
Had a similar experience last Tuesday....I have macular degeneration - had it since my 20s, I'm 68 - and noticed a drop-off in the vision in my left eye so went to my retina doc who informed me there is a new drug that is really the first for the treatment of macular degeneraton. The only way they can tell if it works is to give it to you....if it improves your vision it works, if not, no harm no foul. "Gee" I said, "that's great, I'll try it"......"Okay, the nurse will get you ready for the injection" he says....the nurse moves in, I roll up my sleeve......."No", she sweetly says, "the injection is in your eyeball"....I fainted.....I'm not a real good patient even after all the b.s. with my cancer treatments.....Soooooooo, I got a G.D. shot in my frickin' EYEBALL......yes, it hurt, yes it was worse than it sounds.....
But, the vision in my eye has improved a lot in just a couple of days. A mackrel as they say....any of you suffering with macular degeneration or retina problems need to "look" into it.....yeah, you can see the needle coming....ugh.....but it has reversed the vision decline in that eye, no kidding.
UV
Had a similar experience last Tuesday....I have macular degeneration - had it since my 20s, I'm 68 - and noticed a drop-off in the vision in my left eye so went to my retina doc who informed me there is a new drug that is really the first for the treatment of macular degeneraton. The only way they can tell if it works is to give it to you....if it improves your vision it works, if not, no harm no foul. "Gee" I said, "that's great, I'll try it"......"Okay, the nurse will get you ready for the injection" he says....the nurse moves in, I roll up my sleeve......."No", she sweetly says, "the injection is in your eyeball"....I fainted.....I'm not a real good patient even after all the b.s. with my cancer treatments.....Soooooooo, I got a G.D. shot in my frickin' EYEBALL......yes, it hurt, yes it was worse than it sounds.....
But, the vision in my eye has improved a lot in just a couple of days. A mackrel as they say....any of you suffering with macular degeneration or retina problems need to "look" into it.....yeah, you can see the needle coming....ugh.....but it has reversed the vision decline in that eye, no kidding.
UV
Thats a funny Tony, But damn UV, I think I'd do another colonoscopy over the shot in the eye. Ouch! Drinking the colon cocktail as I call it is about the worst of it. But glad its working for ya.
DQ
DQ
1967 Hull #315-605 FBC ---<*)((((><(
"IN GOD WE TRUST"
'Life may be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well fish'!
"IN GOD WE TRUST"
'Life may be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well fish'!
Last year after my back surgery, I developed a condition in my left eye call a Recurring Corneal Erosion. Basically every morning, the corneal cells would dry onto my eyelid, and rip off the eye when I opened them. One of the treatments that finally worked was to have about a dozen small punctures put into the cornea via a small needle. Had this treatment done twice, and it seems to be doing well. I noticed no pain or discomfort, but was highly jittery about the prospect of watching a needle going into my open eye.
Harv
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In Memory of Vicroy
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Randy - my doc said it had been out a few years and was originally developed for cancer. I'll can't remember the name of the drug other than it started with "Vi.." I was so shell shocked I couldn't remember my name.....I'm on medicare and have a blue cross supplement so it was "FREE"....you guys keep working and paying your medicare taxes so I can continue to get FREE medical care.....actually costs $115 a month for the medicare parts A&B plus about 125/mo. for the blue cross, but still cheap by any standard.
Doc said it was the most effective on the "wet" type of macular degeneration and stops the bleeding under the retina and is a big step up from the laser "welding" they do for that and for detached retinas. I have the "dry" MD and they have just recently discovered it is effective on it too, but that's where the crap shoot comes in, no way to tell ahead of time if it will work or not. The only downside is you can develop an infection from the needle, but they give you some antibiotic drops to use for a couple of days to prevent that.
I had the shot on a Tuesday afternoon and that night, after my eyes had adjusted from the dialation, I was walking out of my shop and noticed some sawdust and cuttings on the floor under the drill press...hmmmmm, don't remember doing that.....stuff had been there a long time but I'd not seen it......next morning I could read the newspaper much easier with my coke bottle glasses. So it works, or at least on me it has. Doc wants to see me again in a month so I guess that's about the time frame for it to max out.
I'll get some more details for ya next week.
UV
Doc said it was the most effective on the "wet" type of macular degeneration and stops the bleeding under the retina and is a big step up from the laser "welding" they do for that and for detached retinas. I have the "dry" MD and they have just recently discovered it is effective on it too, but that's where the crap shoot comes in, no way to tell ahead of time if it will work or not. The only downside is you can develop an infection from the needle, but they give you some antibiotic drops to use for a couple of days to prevent that.
I had the shot on a Tuesday afternoon and that night, after my eyes had adjusted from the dialation, I was walking out of my shop and noticed some sawdust and cuttings on the floor under the drill press...hmmmmm, don't remember doing that.....stuff had been there a long time but I'd not seen it......next morning I could read the newspaper much easier with my coke bottle glasses. So it works, or at least on me it has. Doc wants to see me again in a month so I guess that's about the time frame for it to max out.
I'll get some more details for ya next week.
UV
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MarkS
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UV I will have to pass that along to my 86 yr old mother who has issue in one eye.
I had eye surgeory last week. I had this bump on my eye called a pterygium. The P is silent, like in "swimming."
I figured a few drops in the eye and he scrapes the little thing off! Wrong, they strapped my ass to a gurnee and rammed some morphine into my veins. Pulled an elephant man hood over my head, used a couple of garden rakes to hold my upper and lower eye lids open and then as I was floundering around on the table in great discomfort trying to blink, the anesthesiologist rammed me the juice and the next thing I knew the nurse was rolling me down the hall shaking a petri dish of liquid with a chunk of my eye floating in it! "Heres what they removed from your eye" she said swirlling it around in the jar.
The Doc stopped by to see me before thay shoved me out the door to tell me I had stitches in my eye that would need to be removed in a few weeks. That whole affair adds leaps and bounds to the creepy factor and the sensation of those tiny threads sliding out of your eye ball is a gut buster as well.
Its great dinner topic with friends out to eat. The wincing and the hands over the eyes are always fun to watch.
Bottom line is our eyes have some common ground Vic. Amazing shit they do these days though.
-M
I had eye surgeory last week. I had this bump on my eye called a pterygium. The P is silent, like in "swimming."
I figured a few drops in the eye and he scrapes the little thing off! Wrong, they strapped my ass to a gurnee and rammed some morphine into my veins. Pulled an elephant man hood over my head, used a couple of garden rakes to hold my upper and lower eye lids open and then as I was floundering around on the table in great discomfort trying to blink, the anesthesiologist rammed me the juice and the next thing I knew the nurse was rolling me down the hall shaking a petri dish of liquid with a chunk of my eye floating in it! "Heres what they removed from your eye" she said swirlling it around in the jar.
The Doc stopped by to see me before thay shoved me out the door to tell me I had stitches in my eye that would need to be removed in a few weeks. That whole affair adds leaps and bounds to the creepy factor and the sensation of those tiny threads sliding out of your eye ball is a gut buster as well.
Its great dinner topic with friends out to eat. The wincing and the hands over the eyes are always fun to watch.
Bottom line is our eyes have some common ground Vic. Amazing shit they do these days though.
-M
72 Bertram 25 FBC "Razorsharp" Hull #254-1849
Things of quality have no fear of time.
Bondage to spiritual faith faith to great courage courage to liberty liberty to abundance abundance to complacency to apathy to dependence to bondage
Things of quality have no fear of time.
Bondage to spiritual faith faith to great courage courage to liberty liberty to abundance abundance to complacency to apathy to dependence to bondage
Two quickies on the colonoscopy. First, if you're having it done in the winter ignore the Doc's suggestion that the Holly-go-lightly cocktail is tolerable cold. After downing a gallon of that stuff (vodka doesn't help) I damn near froze to death. Lowered my body temp two points.
Second, had both colonoscopy and endoscopy during the same anesthesia. Ask them to do the endoscopy first. That hose tastes bad enough the first time.
Second, had both colonoscopy and endoscopy during the same anesthesia. Ask them to do the endoscopy first. That hose tastes bad enough the first time.
Mikey
3/18/1963 - -31-327 factory hardtop express, the only one left.
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
3/18/1963 - -31-327 factory hardtop express, the only one left.
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
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Russ Pagels
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Tony Meola
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RAWicklund
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More colonoscopy humor
ABOUT THE WRITER
Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.
... I called my friend Andy Sable, a Gastroenterologist, to make an
appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days
later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis ..
Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough,
reassuring and pati ent manner.
I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my
brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'
I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for
a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it
to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's
enemies.
I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.
Then, on the day before my colonoscopy,
I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat
any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.
Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder
together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.)
Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because
MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.
The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great
sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.
MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but:
Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently.
You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally
empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.
After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.
At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said.. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went
inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of
those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.
Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand.
Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in
their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this,
but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.
When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around
there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me roll
over on my left side, and the Anesthesiologist b egan hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room,
and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by Abba. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that
could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least appropriate.
'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.
'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time,the moment I had been dreading for
more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.
I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine ....' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow
mood. Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt
excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it was a ll over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been
prouder of an internal organ.
ABOUT THE WRITER
Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.
... I called my friend Andy Sable, a Gastroenterologist, to make an
appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days
later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis ..
Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough,
reassuring and pati ent manner.
I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my
brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'
I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for
a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it
to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's
enemies.
I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.
Then, on the day before my colonoscopy,
I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat
any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.
Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder
together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.)
Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because
MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.
The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great
sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.
MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but:
Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently.
You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally
empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.
After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.
At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said.. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went
inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of
those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.
Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand.
Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in
their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this,
but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.
When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around
there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me roll
over on my left side, and the Anesthesiologist b egan hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room,
and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by Abba. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that
could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least appropriate.
'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.
'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time,the moment I had been dreading for
more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.
I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine ....' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow
mood. Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt
excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it was a ll over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been
prouder of an internal organ.
-
In Memory of Vicroy
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- Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 09:19
- Location: Baton Rouge, LA
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In Memory Walter K
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In Memory of Vicroy
- Senior Member
- Posts: 2340
- Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 09:19
- Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Walt, guess you have to have your eye open to shoot it. I'll talk to the doc about the other eye, maybe just take drunk beforehand?
All this is in very small increments of improvment - the "bad" eye he shot is not back to where it was when it went down about a month ago, and not back to where the "good" one is....but still a lot better than it was last week, and mo' importantly, not going down any more.
Genetech also makes a similar drug, Lucentis, which is specific for eye treatment vs. its Avastin which is for cancer. Seems that the Avastin is way less expensive and some druggists are "cutting" the Avastin to, in effect, make Lucntis at cut rate prices....one article says $150 a treatment for the "cut" Avastin vs. $2,000 for the Lucentis. This has created a huge hoo-rah. Read all about it, www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/lucentis
Anyway, it appears to be the real deal for some folks.
UV
All this is in very small increments of improvment - the "bad" eye he shot is not back to where it was when it went down about a month ago, and not back to where the "good" one is....but still a lot better than it was last week, and mo' importantly, not going down any more.
Genetech also makes a similar drug, Lucentis, which is specific for eye treatment vs. its Avastin which is for cancer. Seems that the Avastin is way less expensive and some druggists are "cutting" the Avastin to, in effect, make Lucntis at cut rate prices....one article says $150 a treatment for the "cut" Avastin vs. $2,000 for the Lucentis. This has created a huge hoo-rah. Read all about it, www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/lucentis
Anyway, it appears to be the real deal for some folks.
UV
Vic: I know you have probably seen lots of this type thing to help with your vision, but I saw this device and thought it might help you with reading. It looks pretty neat!! It is a device like a mouse that you roll over a page and it displays it on the TV.
http://www.hammacher.com/Product/78428?promo=search
And thanks for the MD info. My Godfather has it and I will get his doctor to check it out!
http://www.hammacher.com/Product/78428?promo=search
And thanks for the MD info. My Godfather has it and I will get his doctor to check it out!
Rawleigh
1966 FBC 31
1966 FBC 31
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In Memory of Vicroy
- Senior Member
- Posts: 2340
- Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 09:19
- Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Thanks Rawleigh. I have had one of those for about 10 years. It hooks to my laptop. Almost "over magnifies" stuff tho. I have two or three "reading machines" that are closed circuit TVs with zoom lens that display on a monitor or tv. The principal makers are Telesensoy and PulseData, a N.Z. firm. My favorite is the Pico, a hand held electronic magnifier that works on the same principle as a disigal camera. Many of the new smart phones and crackberries have a "glasses" feature that uses the phone's camera and magnifies on the screen. I was sort of a pioneer on the low vision CCTV stuff, and got my first one in about 1989....the eye docs around here used me as their demo guy - they would send paitents to my office and I'd let them play with my magnification toys.
Another cool tool is ZoomText, a computer software program I use that magnifies portions of the screen and even speaks stuff if you want it to. When I got my new computer a few weeks ago the geek said the new version of Windows has the same feature. I stuck with the XP to make sure my version of ZoomText would still work. It's made by Ai Squared.
More ways to skin a cat than feed it melted butter.
UV
Another cool tool is ZoomText, a computer software program I use that magnifies portions of the screen and even speaks stuff if you want it to. When I got my new computer a few weeks ago the geek said the new version of Windows has the same feature. I stuck with the XP to make sure my version of ZoomText would still work. It's made by Ai Squared.
More ways to skin a cat than feed it melted butter.
UV
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