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Survivor, Texas Style

Posted: Aug 31st, '06, 19:07
by CaptPatrick
Walter K sent this to me and I laughed my butt off... Thanks Walt!

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Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled, "Survivor, Texas-Style."

The contestants will all start in Dallas, then drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Midland, Odessa, Lubbock and Amarillo. From there they will go on to Abilene, Fort Worth and finally back to Dallas.

Each will be driving a pink Volvo with bumper stickers that read: "I'm Gay," "I Love the Dixie Chicks," "Boycott Beef," "I Voted for John Kerry", "George Strait Sucks," "Hillary in 2008" and "I'm here to confiscate your guns."

The first one to make it back to Dallas alive wins.
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Br,

Patrick

Posted: Aug 31st, '06, 20:25
by Bruce
At one time that would be true.

But in Austin, Dallas/Ft Worth and possibly Houston they would get a ticker tape parade I'm afraid to say.

Some of the stuff commin out of Texas is damn right scary.


George Strait Sucks
Now thats just mean................
Hillary in 2008" and "I'm here to confiscate your guns
One in the same.............

Posted: Sep 1st, '06, 08:50
by clay
I was listing to Paul Harvey the other day and he told a story that is worthy of note:

It seems that the Department of Transportation in there quest to make the world safer for us installed special "Black Boxes" in 1,200 new large SUV's to find out why new owners nation wide have on an average a 50% greater chanch of having a major accident within the first 12 days after purchasing these vehicles.

The Black boxes were much like those used in airplanes, they were programed to begin voice recording when the vehicle speed exceeded 75 miles per hour and when severe roll in the body and suspension was detected. After a year of study they reported there findings to the Insurance industry and Congress:

In 48 states the cause of the accidents was excessive speed and "agressive driving" and the accidents occurred on major interstate highways, a majority of the voice recordings captured just before the accident revealed statements like "Get the hell out of my way you moron" "Ill blow your doors off" and "Your in the Fast Lane hows it feel to see the grill of this beast in your mirror".

But in two states: Texas and Louisiana the accidents occured on rural county roads and all of the recordings had similar statements just prior to the crash: "Hey Bubba hold my beer let me show you what this baby can do".

Clay