Happy Saint Patrick's Day

The Main Sand Box for bertram31.com

Moderators: CaptPatrick, mike ohlstein, Bruce

Post Reply
User avatar
TailhookTom
Senior Member
Posts: 985
Joined: Jul 3rd, '06, 14:12

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by TailhookTom »

During a recent wedding at the Irish American Home, the Fr. O'leary asked for all the fine Irish men to stand beside the person that meant the most to them........the bartender survived being trampled and is recovering nicely at the hospital.
User avatar
CaptPatrick
Founder/Admin
Posts: 4161
Joined: Jun 7th, '06, 14:25
Location: 834 Scott Dr., LLANO, TX 78643 - 325.248.0809 bertram31@bertram31.com

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by CaptPatrick »

Image

15 Facts About Saint Patrick's Day:

You know you need to wear green on Monday, but what don't you know about Saint Patrick and his big day?

1. WE SHOULD REALLY WEAR BLUE
Saint Patrick himself would have to deal with pinching on his feast day. His color was "Saint Patrick's blue," a light shade. The color green only became associated with the big day after it was linked to the Irish independence movement in the late 18th century.

2. SAINT PATRICK WAS BRITISH
Although he made his mark by introducing Christianity to Ireland in the year 432, Patrick wasn't Irish himself. He was born to Roman parents in Scotland or Wales in the late fourth century.

3. THE IRISH TAKE SAINT PATRICK'S DAY SERIOUSLY
As you might expect, Saint Patrick's Day is a huge deal in his old stomping grounds. It's a national holiday in both Ireland and Northern Ireland.

4. SO DO NEW YORKERS
New York City's Saint Patrick's Day Parade is one of the world's largest parades. Since 1762, 250,000 marchers have traipsed up Fifth Avenue on foot – the parade still doesn't allow floats, cars, or other modern trappings.

5. CHICAGO FEELS LUCKY, TOO
New York may have more manpower, but Chicago has a spectacle all its own. The city has been celebrating Saint Patrick by dumping green dye into the Chicago River since 1962. It takes 40 tons of dye to get the river to a suitably festive shade!

6. IT USED TO BE A DRY HOLIDAY
For most of the 20th century, Saint Patrick's Day was considered a strictly religious holiday in Ireland, which meant that the nation's pubs were closed for business on March 17. (The one exception went to beer vendors at the big national dog show, which was always held on Saint Patrick's Day.) In 1970, the day was converted to a national holiday, and the stout resumed flowing.

7. IT'S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS
Not every city goes all-out in its celebratory efforts. From 1999 to 2007, the Irish village of Dripsey proudly touted that it hosted the Shortest Saint Patrick's Day Parade in the World. The route ran for 26 yards between two pubs. Today, Hot Springs, Arkansas claims the title for brevity – its brief parade runs for 98 feet.

8. THERE'S A REASON FOR THE SHAMROCKS
How did the shamrock become associated with Saint Patrick? According to Irish legend, the saint used the three-leafed plant as a metaphor for the Holy Trinity when he was first introducing Christianity to Ireland.

9. COLD WEATHER HELPED SAINT PATRICK'S LEGEND
In Irish lore, Saint Patrick gets credit for driving all the snakes out of Ireland. Modern scientists suggest that the job might not have been too hard – according to the fossil record, Ireland has never bbeen home to any snakes. Through the Ice Age, Ireland was too cold to host any reptiles, and the surrounding seas have staved off serpentine invaders ever since. Modern scholars think the "snakes" Saint Patrick drove away were likely metaphorical.

10. THERE'S NO CORN IN THAT BEEF
Corned beef and cabbage, a traditional Saint Patrick's Day staple, doesn't have anything to do with the grain corn. Instead, it's a nod to the large grains of salt that were historically used to cure meats, which were also known as "corns".

11. THE WORLD RUNS UP QUITE A BAR TAB
All of the Saint Patrick's Day revelry around the globe is great news for brewers. A 2012 estimate pegged the total amount spent on beer for Saint Patrick's Day celebrations at $245 million. And that's before tips to pubs' bartenders.

12. IT COULD HAVE BEEN SAINT MAEWYN’S DAY
According to Irish legend, Saint Patrick wasn't originally called Patrick. His birth name was Maewyn Succat, but he changed his name to Patricius after becoming a priest.

13. THERE ARE NO FEMALE LEPRECHAUNS
Don't be fooled by any holiday decorations showing lady leprechauns. In traditional Irish folk tales, there are no female leprechauns, only nattily attired little guys.

14. BUT THE LEPRECHAUN ECONOMY IS THRIVING
Another little-known fact from Irish lore: Leprechauns earned that gold they're guarding. According to legend, leprechauns spend their days making and mending shoes. It's hard work, so you can't blame them for being territorial about their pots of gold.

15. THE LINGO MAKES SENSE
You can't attend a Saint Patrick's Day event without hearing a cry of "Erin go Bragh". What's the phrase mean? It's a corruption of the Irish irinn go Brách, which means roughly "Ireland Forever".
Br,

Patrick

Molon labe
User avatar
mike ohlstein
Site Admin
Posts: 2382
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 11:39
Location: So many things seem like no-brainers until you run into someone with no brain.
Contact:

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by mike ohlstein »

I prefer Erin go Braless......

Image
Mike
Mean Team Leader
PREDATOR

Burn Oil
Eat Food
1973 FBC 1286 0273-315
User avatar
Rawleigh
Senior Member
Posts: 3434
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 08:30
Location: Irvington, VA

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Rawleigh »

Mike, you really are mean for not posting the rest of the picture!!
Rawleigh
1966 FBC 31
User avatar
MarkS
Senior Member
Posts: 1160
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 08:40
Location: The Frozen Tundra/EX-democratic stronghold Wisconsin

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by MarkS »

Love The Irish


Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, 'Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!'

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, 'Never mind, I found one.'


Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and asks the first man he meets, 'Do you want to go to heaven?'

The man said, 'I do, Father.'

The priest said, 'Then stand over there against the wall.'

Then the priest asked the second man, 'Do you want to go to heaven?'

'Certainly, Father,' the man replied.

'Then stand over there against the wall,' said the priest.

Then Father Murphy walked up to O'Toole and asked, 'Do you want to go to heaven?'

O'Toole said, 'No, I don't Father.'

The priest said, 'I don't believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don't want to go to heaven?'

O'Toole said, 'Oh, when I die , yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now.'


Paddy was in New York .

He was patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, 'Okay, pedestrians.' Then he'd allow the traffic to pass.

He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk.

After the cop had shouted, 'Pedestrians!' for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, 'Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?'


Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney.

'Did you see the paper?' asked Gallagher. 'They say I died!!'

'Yes, I saw it!' replied Finney. 'Where are ye callin' from?'


An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut . The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'

'Just water,' says the priest.

The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'

The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'


Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, 'Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with the little woman.'

'Oh yeah?' said Charlie, 'And how did this one end?'

'When it was over,' Mike replied, 'She came to me on her hands and knees.'

'Really,' said Charles, 'Now that's a switch! What did she say?'

She said, 'Come out from under the bed, you little bastard.'


Patton staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Patton sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed..

In the morning, Patton woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Kathleen staring at him from across the room.

She said, 'You were drunk again last night weren't you?'

Patton said, 'Why you say such a mean thing?'

'Well,' Kathleen said, 'it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly ....... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.
72 Bertram 25 FBC "Razorsharp" Hull #254-1849
Things of quality have no fear of time.

Bondage to spiritual faith faith to great courage courage to liberty liberty to abundance abundance to complacency to apathy to dependence to bondage
IRGuy
Senior Member
Posts: 1767
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 07:48
Location: Wilmington, NC

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by IRGuy »

A day late, but who is counting?
------------------------------------------------------------------------

Michael O'Toole was walking on the beach on the coast of Ireland... he saw a glint of glass in the sand, and realized it was the neck of a bottle.

He pulled it out of the sand and bushed it off.. and saw there was a wee leprechaun inside. The little guy yelled at Michael "Let me out.. let me out.. I have been in this bottle for years.. If you let me out I will grant you any three wishes you ask for."

Michael pulled the cork out of the bottle and the little guy popped out. Brushing himself off he said "Thank you.. thank you! I am free at last! Now.. I will grant you three wishes.. anything you want.. just ask!"

Michael paused for a second, scratched his chin, and told the leprechaun "Well.. I likes me drink. What can you do to for me to have a drink?" The leprechaun said "Hold out your hand", and poof.. a glass appeared in Michael's hand. The leprechaun said.. this is a magic glass.. any time you want a drink just hold out your hand, and this glass will appear and be full of Guinness." Michael held the glass out, and magically it became filled with Guinness. He drank it down and immediately the glass was refilled with Guinness. He drank that down and immediately the glass was refilled again.

The leprechaun then said.. "I have to be going, so what do you want for your second and third wish? Michael looked at the full glass in his hand, and thought for a second, and said...

"Give me two more of these glasses".
Frank B
1983 Bertram 33 FBC "Phoenix"
--------------
Trump lied! Washington DC isn't a swamp.. it is a cesspool!
Navatech

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Navatech »

Rawleigh wrote:Mike, you really are mean for not posting the rest of the picture!!
He DID post the whole picture but due to it's size part of it is hidden :-)

Image

I have resized it for your viewing pleasure :-))
Last edited by Navatech on Mar 21st, '14, 12:00, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
Rawleigh
Senior Member
Posts: 3434
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 08:30
Location: Irvington, VA

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Rawleigh »

Now that is more like it! I thought Mike was just teasing us!
Rawleigh
1966 FBC 31
User avatar
CaptPatrick
Founder/Admin
Posts: 4161
Joined: Jun 7th, '06, 14:25
Location: 834 Scott Dr., LLANO, TX 78643 - 325.248.0809 bertram31@bertram31.com

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by CaptPatrick »

He was......... And that's why he's the Mean Team Leader.
Br,

Patrick

Molon labe
User avatar
JimmyG
Senior Member
Posts: 334
Joined: Jun 30th, '06, 16:04

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by JimmyG »

User avatar
CaptPatrick
Founder/Admin
Posts: 4161
Joined: Jun 7th, '06, 14:25
Location: 834 Scott Dr., LLANO, TX 78643 - 325.248.0809 bertram31@bertram31.com

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by CaptPatrick »

Yeah, Jimmy, she is a bit pasty white...
Br,

Patrick

Molon labe
User avatar
Dug
Senior Member
Posts: 2256
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 11:04
Location: Worcester, MA

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Dug »

Mike's girl is just about perfect in my book... Wow!
Damn. Nice.
User avatar
MarkS
Senior Member
Posts: 1160
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 08:40
Location: The Frozen Tundra/EX-democratic stronghold Wisconsin

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by MarkS »

Dug, You just know the prick won't share...........
72 Bertram 25 FBC "Razorsharp" Hull #254-1849
Things of quality have no fear of time.

Bondage to spiritual faith faith to great courage courage to liberty liberty to abundance abundance to complacency to apathy to dependence to bondage
Tony Meola
Senior Member
Posts: 6940
Joined: Jun 29th, '06, 21:24
Location: Hillsdale, New Jersey
Contact:

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Tony Meola »

MarkS wrote:Dug, You just know the prick won't share...........
That is why he leads the mean team.
1975 FBC BERG1467-315
Chris W
Posts: 15
Joined: Mar 14th, '14, 19:05
Location: Queensland Australia

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Chris W »

Love the picture Jimmy, I had a good laugh. After a day in the sun she would come in handy for a night time glow stick.
Navatech

Re: Happy Saint Patrick's Day

Post by Navatech »

Handy is not a verb that I would use...

;-))

Ooops... I thought you were referring to the "Erin" picture... As for the beach picture, neither of them does anything for me...
Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot] and 292 guests